This article is part of Finding the Words, a newsletter that delivers practical insights on the day’s issues.
Have you ever worked so hard for something, only to watch it go to someone else?
I have, plenty of times. And odds are, you have too.
I've been thinking about that question a lot this week, from the other side of one of those stories.
Last week, Washington Women in Public Relations named me its 2026 Woman of the Year. It's an honor I'm still taking in, especially given the remarkable women who have received it over the last three decades.
But here's what most people don't know: This wasn’t my first time as a finalist.
It was my third.
The first time I was named a finalist for the award was in 2015. Honestly, I had no business being among the honorees. I was still finding my footing as a purpose-driven business owner. The second time was in 2021, a few years after launching Mission Partners. Both times I showed up, celebrated with the finalists, said thank you, and then went right back to work, trying not to show my disappointment. (And yes, both times, there was a little voice saying "maybe next time it'll be my turn…")
I suspect many of you reading this right now are like me: always striving, always reaching for what's next. Which is why I thought some of you could use the reminder I've often needed:
It doesn't always turn out the way we expect the first time. Sometimes, not the second time either.
And that's OK. Because it’s all part of life, and learning how to live it well.
When I was a kid, my mom would always remind me to "leave it better than I found it." Sometimes she was talking about the kitchen sink, but more often, as I now recognize, she was preparing me for life. Leave it better. I've tried to take her message to heart: to show up, do the work, and say thank you, whether or not anyone acknowledges it.
I don't always get it right, and I struggle with self-doubt more than you might believe.
But I've come to believe that my mom's mantra applies to all moments in life, including the moments where we've come up short. Sometimes it's not about the win or loss at all, but about how we handle hard things, how we congratulate the winning candidate or team, and how we show back up the next morning. (For more on this, revisit my column on Kara Lawson's advice to "handle hard better.")
Even when we come up short, we can still walk away a better version of ourselves.
So, if you're in a season where your efforts feel invisible, or you feel like you're getting passed over for something that felt so right for you, here's a reminder:
Keep doing the right thing, even when no one is watching.
Some of our most impactful work happens in the choices most people never see: the decision to stay true to values when it would be easier not to, or to make time for a young colleague when our calendar says we can’t.
It's in how we show up, day after day—and in how we practice gratitude along the way.
None of us get there alone. I think of my mom, my husband, my career-long mentor Don, my business partners and the special people who believed in me before I believed in myself. I think of Shakirah Hill Taylor and Dr. Sheila Brooks, the leaders who were honored as Women of the Year finalists with me. I feel blessed to have journeyed alongside each one of them.
Practicing gratitude does the heart good, this I know for sure. And to prove it, I invite you to reflect on one person who has been journeying alongside you, someone whose belief in you has helped you handle hard things. This week, reach out and tell them.
It may be the most meaningful work you do this week.
Looking back, I’m glad it took three tries, and I'm grateful for each one, because together they taught me that recognition is always second to the work itself. Call it the gift of patience (and maybe of growing older), but somewhere along the way, I stopped waiting for my "turn" and just started celebrating the ride.
Thanks to you for reading today's column and for believing in this work along the way, too. I am grateful for all the ways we've crossed paths.
Watch WWPR's 2026 Woman of the Year ceremony on C-SPAN or learn more and get involved in our community of women communicators at WWPR.org.
This post is part of the Finding The Words column, a series published every Wednesday that delivers a dose of communication insights direct to your inbox. If you like what you read, we hope you’ll subscribe to ensure you receive this each week.
